Autism Journeys: Pairing: Your best relationship with a child

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Pairing: Your best relationship with a child

I've been thinking a lot lately about a concept called "pairing". This is the process of "pairing" yourself with reinforcement so that a child or learner regards you as a positive experience in his or her life. Before placing instructional demands on a learner, a trusting and rewarding relationship must be established. Best results can only be achieved when a child enjoys spending time with you!

Ways to do this:

--- Start with FUN! Find what is reinforcing to the child and supply it!, with no expectations. Best of all is to find what is fun (or funny) to the child in play -- tickle, chase, fall over (yes, sometimes you being the clown is hilarious and endearing!!) Is there a favorite song or comforting tune the child prefers? Maybe it's a tangible item- if the child loves goldfish crackers, be the one who has them, if the child is fascinated by spinning objects, have the best ones! Be the bearer of all good things!

--- Be in control of the reinforcing item or activity, so that the child has to go through you to get it. (Examples, you have access to desired treats and entertainment, toys are out of reach, you play the most fun games like tickle, airplane, or I gotcha)

--- Do not supply or offer reinforcement if the child is engaged in any problem behavior (you don't want to reinforce the wrong behavior).

How do you know if you are "paired" with a child/learner? Simply put --

Does the child approach you or avoid you?

Hopefully, he or she runs to you with excitement! But if not (and it can take time), keep working on being a positive, fun, rewarding addition to the child's life.

Dawn Gummersall
Speech/Language Pathologist

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Ms. Gamee goes to the Dentist

A client at Autism Journeys has a difficult time at the dentist. My co-workers thought maybe having me by her side would ease a bit of the anxiety. Since I’ve never been to a dentist’s office, Mom thought it best to test my skills out with her own children first.

Jordan, Carter, Mom and I went to the dentist on Wednesday. Jordan has always struggled to remain calm at the dentist. Usually, he needs laughing gas just to get his teeth cleaned. This was to be Carter’s first “real” visit. This was my chance to show Mom how I can help.

Jordan and Carter were nervous when we arrived at the dentist. But once we walked through the doors everyone in the lobby was ooing and awing over me and how adorable I am. When it was our turn, Jordan and Carter were both eager to take me to meet the rest of the dentist’s team.

Mom had me get up in the chair with Jordan. Jordan was still nervous, but was very preoccupied by me. He played with my ears and rubbed my head throughout the entire cleaning. I rested on his chest to provide him some deep pressure comfort. No tears and no laughing gas! It was over very quickly. Mom and the dentist were so proud of Jordan. Most importantly, Jordan was really proud of himself.

After Jordan, it was Carter’s turn. After seeing me with Jordan, Carter decided he wanted me on the chair with him too. At first, Carter was nervous when the instruments made those high pitch sounds. I could sense he was starting to wiggle, so I gently crept up a little higher on his chest to help hold him steady. It worked. He relaxed, opened his mouth and was able to tune out the remaining sound with headphones.

As for me, I quite enjoyed all the attention. The noises didn’t bother me a bit. The yummy smells of bubblegum and strawberries were quite interesting, but I think I’ll stick to my poultry flavored toothpaste at home. When we were all finished, the dentist offered me a job. Mom said I passed the test with flying colors. I am now available to accompany any clients to the dentist. If you want me to join you at your next visit talk to my Mom, Kate.

Here’s to a healthy and happy smile.

Woof Woof,

Ms. Gamee

Ms. Gamee's Gab

Holy cow! Or in my case, holy dog! What a crazy couple weeks I’ve had. Life in the spotlight is ruff. Each week I’ve been able to meet more of the families who visit Autism Journeys. It’s been fun to try new things with each of them. One of my favorites is playing fetch. Sometimes the kids are learning to take turns, and other times they’re working on speech and communication. Mom says I’m doing a wonderful job being patient and waiting for the kids to give me commands. One of my other favorites has been going on walks. It’s been so nice to get outside and take in the fresh air. Being traced with sidewalk chalk was fun too.

BBQ GAMES

That said, it was the older, more mature (aka trained) dogs like myself that won all the games. I came in second in the musical hula-hoops. It’s musical chairs but with hula-hoops. When the music stopped the dogs had to sit in the hoop. After musical hula-hoops we played wet t-shirt relay races. I must say I don’t really understand what the point of the race was, other then to embarrass all the dogs. Personally, I don’t get it, but Mom and my brothers, along with all the other people sure got a big kick out of it. Apparently dogs in wet t-shirts are adorable.